she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
