what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
