I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Randomize