I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize