She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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