apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
