Taylor Swift is so right about you.
operation have a gay friend backfired
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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