Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
one two three fourrrrnication!
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Don't EVER smell your tampon
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
