I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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