He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
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fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
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