everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
