I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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