Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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