It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
