maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize