I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
