I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
