He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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