More tranny stories later!
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
