I think I just saw someone hide a body.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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