I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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