I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
