I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Your tits are I can't wait for
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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