The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
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