I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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