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• (408): View more from California

  My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable

  (818): View more from California

  Freshman in high school? Just your type

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• (416): View more from Ontario

  i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow

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• (562): View more from California

  I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.

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• (716): View more from New York

  It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?

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• (986): View more from

  He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.

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