508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
40s are totally the cure
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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