I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize