The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
