To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
