I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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