update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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