The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
