My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
