We tried having a conversation with our noses.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
