Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize