In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
