i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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