when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
