did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I want a musical about memes.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
