We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
