I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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