Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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