i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
