there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
