Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
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