who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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