I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
me + whiskey = a bad person
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
