Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
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