69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
