He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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